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How to quit porn as a Christian

Most Christian men who struggle with porn already know what they believe about it. The problem isn't knowing. It's what happens at 1am. Here's a plan built on grace, not shame.

What the Bible says

"Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." (Matthew 5:27-28, KJV)

"There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape." (1 Corinthians 10:13, KJV)

"There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus." (Romans 8:1, KJV)

Why shame keeps you stuck

Research shows guilt and shame about porn go with more distress, not less use. Beating yourself up does not help you stop.[1] Conviction says "this isn't who you are, get up". Shame says "you're hopeless, hide". Only one of them helps you stop.

A practical plan

  1. Make a way of escape in advance. If-then plans work. Across 94 studies, people who decided 'if X happens, I will do Y' reached their goals clearly more often.[2] Example: "If I'm in bed with my phone after 11pm, I put it in the kitchen and pray."
  2. Block it tonight. Free blockers on iPhone and Android, with the passcode held by someone you trust.
  3. Confess to one brother. James 5:16: "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed." Pick one man you trust and tell him the truth.
  4. Join a group. Celebrate Recovery runs Christian recovery groups in many churches. More options: where to get help.
  5. When you fall, get up the same day. Missing a single day did not ruin habit building in the study. One slip is not the end. What you do the next day counts.[3]

Questions

Is watching porn a sin in Christianity?

Most Christian traditions teach that it is, based on Jesus' words in Matthew 5:28 about looking at a woman with lust. They also teach grace: 'there is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus' (Romans 8:1).

How do Christians quit porn?

With a plan, not just willpower: decide in advance what you'll do in your danger moment, block porn on your devices, confess to one trusted brother for accountability, join a group like Celebrate Recovery, and get up the same day if you fall.

Want a plan instead of willpower? Quit90 builds your 90-day plan and shows your quit date.

Sources

  1. Grubbs JB, Perry SL (2019). Moral Incongruence and Pornography Use: A Critical Review and Integration. Journal of Sex Research 56(1):29-37; Grubbs JB et al. (2019). Pornography problems due to moral incongruence. Archives of Sexual Behavior 48:397-415. link.springer.com
  2. Gollwitzer PM, Sheeran P (2006). Implementation intentions and goal achievement: A meta-analysis of effects and processes. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology 38:69-119. kops.uni-konstanz.de
  3. Lally P et al. (2010). European Journal of Social Psychology 40(6):998-1009. onlinelibrary.wiley.com